Who always is complaining

She doesn't like the weather hot

And whinges when it's raining

She hates it when it's quiet

But despises too much noise

She grumbles when I play outside

With other girls and boys

She says dogs are deplorable

And cannot cope with cats

She gives abuse to refuse trucks

She thinks they bring in rats

She shouts "YOUR TV'S MUCH TOO LOUD!"

While banging on our wall

She nags us in the holidays

But whines when we're at school

She's angry with the pensioner

At number thirty-eight

She carps about the squeaking sound

Of our old rusty gate

She criticises window cleaners

And the postmen too

Every night she remonstrates

Each time we flush our loo

No matter where Dad parks his car

She cries "THAT'S MY PARKING SPACE!"

If you saw her you'd know her

By her scary stony face

She moans about the driveways

She moans about road signs

She moans about the potholes

She moans about the crime

She moans about the gardens

She moans the litter

She moans about the Council Tax

She's miserable and bitter

She moaned when we moved in

She's moaning 'cause we're going

She saw my website yesterday

Now she's moaning about this poem