A roughy

A toughy

A beast

And a lout

I bully my way onto your plate

I'm rude

I'm crude

I'm the food you most hate

Bad Bill Broccoli is my best mate

I'm Russell the Brussels Sprout

I'm small

So uncool

A poisonous ball

Awfully obnoxious

And not sweet at all

Can you think of a more horrid vegetable

Than me - Russell the Brussels Sprout?

I'll ruin your delicious Christmas dinner

Give you frightening nightmares as well

If you want `disgusting' then I'm a winner

I'm cooked in the kitchens of hell

I'm mean

I'm green

Utterly obscene

You'd prefer a cute carrot or a beautiful bean

Cover me in ketchup

Smother me in sauce

Drown me in gravy

I'll still spoil your main course

If I'm finally swallowed it's often by force

I'm Russell the Brussels Sprout

I'm deadly and foul

I'm putrid and rotten

And bitter – so best left in Tesco forgotten

I'm the storm cloud to spoil the sunniest day

'Cause I make so much wind that I'll blow you away

All children scream “YUK” when they see me and say

“I don't want Russell the Brussels Sprout”