When women rule the world

We’ll begin letters with “Dear madam or sir”

Report to womanagers in places of work

Operate machines womanually during power cuts

Wear clothes produced from woman-made fibres

Communicate via e-femails

Find mummy longlegs clinging to bathroom walls

Hear millions of Chinese speaking Womandarin

Live in womansions if we become rich or famous

Spread womanure to help the gardens grow

Place photos, ornaments and clocks on womantlepieces

Buy fresh womango juice from supermarkets

SCREAM as Queen Kong devours New York (including Womanhatten)

Watch Womanchester United v Womanchester City in the Premiership

Replace buoys with girls in the oceans

Walk over womanhole covers beneath our feet

And the Earth would be a safer, saner, more sensible place

With women in charge of the whole huwoman race