Grandad Drives a Tank

When Grandad picks me up from school
Everyone says “Wow, that's cool!”
On the road he breaks all rules
Grandad drives a tank

He fought in it in World War Two
It flies the flag - red, white and blue
Keep your TARDIS Doctor Who
Grandad drives a tank

He can ride it where he likes
Crushes cars and bashes bikes
Don't make him angry or uptight
Grandad drives a tank

I love to sit inside its cockpit
Give the turret a spin
Shout aloud "Up periscope!"
Bully me you'd never win
Surrounded by this metal skin
I'm a sardine in a mighty tin

At first it seemed quite strange to us
My teacher cried "It's dangerous"
I never catch a train or bus
Grandad drives a tank

Dig them caterpillar tracks
Dig that armour - front, side, back
Careful 'cause he could attack
Grandad drives a tank

He takes it out on shopping runs
Scares the high street with the guns
It's just his way of having fun
Grandad drives a tank

His vehicle choice is unusual
A massive mean machine
It's parked outside his house at night
Camouflaged in brown and green
Right next to his submarine
I can't wait till I'm seventeen
Then I'll drive Grandad's tank